I close my eyes, facing and embracing the pain
Shy yet unafraid as I await the break of day
My fate unravels before me, clarity within the madness
Twists and turns of extreme love and sadness
Intertwined, haunting me to my core as I turn the pages
Meaning lost in shadow, craving the light
Tears falling to the ground and feeding the beast within
Such powerful emotions, driving me, insanity at its best
To love and grieve at once, overwhelming, liberating
Do I have the strength? I am weak…I weep
Feeling so much, eternity washing over me
Drowning, cleansing, making me whole and free
No longer a slave to my insecurities
No longer chained by doubts of my own self worth
No longer the shell that I’d become, but full of life
This surreal dream my reality has become
Can it possibly be real? Has my path been revealed?
I search my soul…I can’t bear the pain or the joy
But it is mine to bear and a master that can not be denied
Spiraling out of control I fall to pieces
Downward, further and faster with every breath
To my destruction, my rebirth, a great awakening
Won’t you catch me? Must I catch myself?
Am I to perish in this river of emotion that pulls me along?
Or am I to emerge anew, full of the life and love that has eluded me
For so very long, taunting me with a brutal accuracy?
Of this I am not sure; my heart and my head battle within me
So I close my eyes once again, feeding from the pain
Taking it into myself, burning with it, becoming the Phoenix
I know not my path; nothing is certain. But I must follow it to the end
Such is the way of our fragile lives, our questionable existence
And through the pain I find my peace. Love is pain; pain is love.
To feel one you must expose yourself to the other
Or risk never truly knowing what you have been missing all along.
© Lady Jennith Lynn