Why Twin Flames Run by Karen Crystal

The following was not written by me; it is a piece I came across which resonated with me as helpful to those who are struggling to understand why Twin, or they themselves, have been ‘running’ from the connection.  As always, shared with Great Love.  xxx  Jennith Lynn

If you are reading this then you likely know how it feels to meet a soul whom has turned your world inside out and who has awakened such an intense and incredible love within you that you never knew was possible. Meeting this person has caused you to suddenly feel AWAKE! Old priorities have dissolved as they no longer seem important anymore. Your senses have heightened and you have never felt a love like this before. You were convinced this person was “the one”. You know they love you so much too and never felt this way about anyone else other than you. So how can they run away from this? How can they just ditch you without seeming to care? How can they deny such love and beauty?

I can tell you why. FEAR. The opposite of love is not hate, but fear. In this quick guide, I will detail the different fears your twin flame is likely going through which have caused him to run away. I will refer to your twin flame as a “he” just for simplicity of reading, but it can also equally apply to “she” twin flames. I am hoping my guide can shed light and understanding on the thought processes and the subconscious fears that are causing your twin flame to run away from you and the connection and provide you with some comfort in this difficult time of separation. So lets get straight into it.

Fear no. 1: Fear of REJECTION

You may think your twin flame is running away from you, but really, they are running away from THEMSELVES. They do not like or love some parts of themselves deep down and they therefore feel insecure that YOU will reject them eventually like they are rejecting themselves. They are petrified of you rejecting them because they will take it as “proof” that they are not good enough just like they think they aren’t. They KNOW that this connection is very deep, deep to the core of their being, the soul, and is therefore sent to them from God/the universe/their idea of the Creator.

In this sense, you are a mirror of the universe/God/their Creator and they are so afraid that the universe/god etc will show them that they are not good enough if your connection does not work out. Subconsciously they think that if the connection fails, then the universe or God is saying they are not good enough for this pure love, that they are being PUNISHED for not being good enough by having the love taken away.

So ultimately, they feel the love will be taken away from them because they believe they don’t deserve it. Human’s biggest fear is of not belonging, of not being accepted. Your twin flame is therefore running away from JUDGMENT. If he runs, he knows you won’t truly get to know him and his flaws, so even if you do reject him, he feels it is not based on who he is because he never let you get close enough to judge him on who he is. If you eventually walk away, he will know it’s because of how he BEHAVED, not because of WHOM HE IS.

Fear no. 2: Fear it’s a TRICK

Your twin flame is likely so convinced that the universe/god thinks he is unworthy of love and should therefore be punished, that he is suspicious that this connection is sent from God as a trick, to test him, to tempt him, to see if he is selfish or silly enough to reach for the twin flame love and stupidly believe he may deserve that love. He is judging himself so harshly, that he is convinced that God is ashamed of him and will punish him if he is “selfish” enough to reach for this love and try and attain a relationship with you.

In so many religions, and even if one is not religious, its teachings have rubbed off so greatly and subconsciously in our societies, we are taught that we as humans are ultimately bad and need to be punished and be meek and repentant for our “sins”. We are taught to hold ourselves back, that we are “big-headed” and bad if we go for what we want, and that fulfilling our own needs is “selfish”. We are taught that to be selfless and to ignore our own needs is being kind and “a good person”. Therefore, we feel it is a “sin” or selfish to have all we want in life – to have such intense and pure love. It seems too good to be true in a world where “God” is punishing us for our “sins”.

We are programmed by our society and religions to believe we are not good enough just as we are and that we must punish ourselves and choose to live in “lack” in order to work towards being more acceptable. We are taught to seek “God’s” approval by disapproving of ourselves and putting ourselves second best all the time. This is so ingrained within many of us on earth, that naturally we aren’t going to feel worthy of such a gift from God/the universe/Creator. So twin flames stay away, feeling that they would be punished if they were selfish enough to actually go for and get what they want.

Fear no. 3: Fear of being CONSUMED by you and the emotions

Your twin flame has been obsessing over you just as much as you have been over him. His life has been turned upside down, he feels such intense longing to be with you. Tons of emotions are coming up, both amazing and bad because even the parts of himself he needs to heal are coming up. He feels consumed by this connection. But he has not been taught how to effectively process and handle his emotions. Such intense emotions are exhausting for him and therefore his only way to deal with them is to shut them off and that means shutting you off too.

He wants to get a grip of the emotions because he feels swallowed up by them and cannot concentrate in life at all, so he just tries to shut them off completely. But from time to time, he may want to feel them and that’s when he acts hot. But then it gets too much again, so he goes back to being cold.

He is petrified. Full of fear. He knows you and this connection have such a hold on him. The rest of his life, his priorities, also don’t feel as important anymore. He feels his old life falling away and making way for this “bigger thing” with you and the universe. But he is so scared that if it does not work out with you, because he isn’t good enough and the universe will take it away from him, then what would he be left with? How could he cope when this connection has taken a hold of him and has been controlling his life so much but then it’s taken away? Then what? He knows if he “let himself go too far in allowing this” then there would definitely be no going back to a “normal life” but he feels it is inevitable that your love will be taken away from him one way or another.

So he is trying to protect himself and go “back to normal” life so that when you are taken away from him, he still has something left and can pretend to himself that it was nothing extraordinary with you anyway. He’s not allowing himself to even taste a real life with you because he knows he won’t be able to handle the pain of always feeling that loss when you are “taken away from him”. He is trying to protect himself, not allow himself to love too much because he feels he would not be able to cope with the loss of that love.

Fear no. 4: Fear of being SUCKED IN by something unknown

He can feel the universe is not allowing him to just simply walk away from this. He is trying his hardest to walk away and pretend to himself it means nothing to try and protect himself from the pain of loss which he feels is inevitable. He thinks to himself “Why even bother trying, because that would mean getting my hopes up and that would hurt even more when it doesn’t work out.” But trying to resist is not working – there is something pulling at him constantly, pulling him towards you, but it feels BAD (because the parts of himself which he feels make him bad are coming up). He feels out of control which feels BAD. What is this sucking me into? It’s the trick, it’s the temptation sucking me into destruction. If I go with this, then I will be punished.  I must be strong, I must fight it. I am not good enough therefore I must fight it to show that I am not bad enough to think I deserve this.

Everything he is not loving or accepting about himself is coming to the surface and creating negative emotions inside him. But he mistakenly thinks these are all the things that the universe or God does not love about him. These emotions are so strong the more he resists but he mistakenly thinks it’s because he cannot control this “temptation” that such bad feelings are being thrown at him from the universe/God, which makes him resist more, be more afraid and feel more trapped. He just wants to escape and go back to normal. He thinks he is SUPPOSED to fight this connection (“temptation”).

But really it is the ego that is afraid to give way to soul intuition. So the ego creates a ton of fears to try and force him to push away this love, this awakening (which he is being drawn to) so it can remain in control. This leads into the next fear.

Fear no. 5: Fear of LOSING EGO IDENTITY

As humans, we learn to get our identity from the ego. We believe that we are our thoughts and what happens to us in our lives. But these are never constant. The only thing that remains constant in our being is our soul. Our bodies are mortal, our minds are mortal, our emotions are mortal, our souls are immortal. We are truly our souls and our thoughts are forever changing and what happens to us in our lives never lasts forever either. We are truly what is always there in all lifetimes and between lifetimes on earth – our souls. But as humans, we believe that we are bbased on what we THINK we are, which is ego’s influence.

Therefore when we meet our twin flame, suddenly we are aware that perhaps who we really are is not whom we THOUGHT we are. We become aware of this deeper self, the soul. We may not consciously know it is our soul to begin with, but we feel it, we feel how it is immortal and has existed so much longer than this earthly existence. We know the twin flame has awakened us to this. But because we don’t UNDERSTAND it, and because the ego wants to understand everything, we then reject it.

The ego’s perception of “I”, “Me” is now in question. But we feel so uncomfortable not knowing who we are anymore. We feel very lonely, as though no-one around us really understands us anymore. We fear that we will be forever lonely and “weird” if we go against the norm and investigate and “grow” into this real me, the soul. But we subconsciously feel we are being drawn to investigate this more. We don’t feel ready, so we run from it. We cling to our old ego identity to try and run away from facing OURSELVES and all the parts of ourselves we don’t love or accept. We are being drawn to learn self-love, but we don’t know where to begin or if we can achieve self-love, so we try to run away from the whole thing and live in denial for an “easier” life.

Also, your twin flame may feel that his competence, male identity etc. is based upon logical thinking and that intuition is more of a “feminine” trait. They don’t want to feel they are losing their manliness by accepting this soul intuition. By running away from you, they feel they can avoid all of this difficulty and remain logical and “manly”. This leads onto the next fear.


Many twin flames fear that if they allow themselves to be sucked into this, then they will change even more deep down and may lose friends and family if these people don’t understand them anymore. They feel so alone deep down, knowing that they have already changed so much because of this new “deeper awareness” and they fear that if they go along with this connection then they will change even more and friends and family won’t recognise them anymore and will reject them. Again, it is a fear of rejection. These people in their lives represent their old lives and they are their safety nets, their comfort zone. Your twin flame feels that he NEEDS to stay the same to keep these people in his life. He fears no-one understands him and that he will be alone forever if he allows himself to go with the flow of this connection and change even more.

Fear No. 7: Fear of FAILURE

Your twin flame is also likely petrified of this connection going wrong and blaming himself for “messing up”. He feels he cannot lose or mess up what he doesn’t choose. So he tries to deny to himself the importance of this connection. He subconsciously thinks that if he can convince himself that your connection isn’t important, then it won’t hurt when he walks away from it. This is his way to try and avoid admitting he has fears.

So, as you can see, twin flames often have many fears and many of these are running on a subconscious level. They don’t know they need to even work through these fears because they are not even sure if this connection is real or something they should try and work towards. It is NOT personal that they are running away from you. Ironically, it is because he loves you so much that he is running to try and protect himself if the connection does not work out, because he feels he would not be able to cope if this love was taken away from him.

If you are feeling stuck in your twin flame connection and want to know what you can do about it and how to unite with your twin flame once and for all, then I feel my articles on my website will greatly help you on this journey.


Thank you and all the best on your Twin Flame journey.


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